When Rush Limbaugh beats up on President Obama for ordering the killing of three black Muslim kids and people take him seriously.
When it is revealed that Paul Newman was a drunk who wore a bottle opener on a chain around his neck.
When WaPo columnist George Will is seriously worried about blue jean overuse.
When a fake waiter makes off with $186 from restaurant patrons.
When a leading Democratic congresswoman is nailed for a compromising wiretapped conversation that was recorded but says it never happened.
When a man fakes an armed robbery to make his ex-girlfriend feel bad.
When indicted former Illinois Governor Ron Blagojevich asks a judge for permission to leave the country so he can appear in a reality TV show filming in Costa Rico.
When Sam Zell admits that he made a mistake.
When waterboarding two Al Qaeda operatives 266 times isn't torture, nor is keeping suspects awake for a week and a half because they can always sleep later.
When confessing to war crimes shouldn't be actionable because everybody's doing it.
When a female hair stylist holds a robber captive as a sex slave for two days.
When a teevee news anchor drops the F-Bomb.
When Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad says that an Iranian-American journalist sentenced to eight years in the slammer for espionage should be afforded every opportunity for a thorough defense.
When Sarah Palin admits, albeit indirectly, that she is pro-choice.
When a father of 14 is jailed for owing more than $500,000 in child support.
When Newt Gingrich will run for president of a ravaged, post-nuclear America in 2012.
When gun sales are up because the world is coming to an end.
When McDonald's customers are injured when a golden arches sign falls on their SUV.
When Arlen Specter can't even keep his flip-flops straight.
When double-mastectomy breast cancer survivor Christina Applegate is spotted smoking a cigarette.
When Florida Republicans are still trying to screw voters.
When famous people are spitting into test tubes at "DNA parties."
When Obama shakes hands with one of the dictator dudes instead of giving him a wedgie.
When a mayor gets a warning for speeding but insists on a ticket.
When Lindsay Lohan is refusing to go back into rehab and no one cares.
When John Madden announces that he's retiring. And is replaced by Cris Collinsworth.
When a boy gets back at his mother by setting a Dollar General store on fire.
When a distaught woman who jumped lands on a teenager relaxing in a massage chair.
When Republicans are proud of their really pure minority, never mind that it continues to shrink.
When the Pet Shop Boys change their name to Rescue Shelter Boys at the urging of PETA.Click here for the last installment of
You Know Society Is Doomed . . .