You Know That Society Is Doomed . . .

When even smarty-pants congressfolk are incapable of distinguishing end-of-life counseling from "death panels" and drop the provision from health-care reform legislation. (Then again, maybe Terri Schiavo could set them straight.)

When a mom is charged with drunken breastfeeding.

When "Reno 911!" is cancelled by Comedy Central.

When it's obvious that the 2008 presidential election broke people's brains.

When a serial 911 caller "just needed someone to talk to." (Now he's got a cellmate to chat with.)

When a teen sets himself on fire while trying to imitate a YouTube clip.

When women's boxing becomes an Olympic sport. (Golf, too.)

When omerta has its limits.

When a man is charged with bicycle road rage.

When Americans no longer have the right to not have a black president.

When a 600-pound inmate hides a gun in his layers of fat.

When a man blames his cat for over 1,000 porn downloads. (The cat was not charged.)

When Ann Coulter keeps adding people to her Death Wish List.

When an 86-year-old shoplifter is busted for stealing anti-wrinkle cream.

When a city worker is suspended for not saying hello to the mayor.

When pot bellies become fashionable. (But just on guys.)

When a woman is charged after not letting boys leave their tent during a camp-out.

When over 20 advertisers pull out of Glenn Beck's Fox News show because he engages in hate speech.

When a bumbling bank robber shows the teller his ID and account number.

When four women are charged with gluing a man's penis to his stomach. (He was cheating on his wife.)

When a judge halts electrolysis treatments for a convicted wife killer.

When weird things keep happening outside the gates to Martha Stewart's estate. (Like death and mayhem.)

When fish fall from the sky and shatter a woman's car windshield.

When an offer of a Sony 37-inch flat-screen TV for only $100 is too good to be true. (Ahem, just the latest variation of the "rocks in a box" scam.)

When carry guns at presidential rallies is seen as merely exercising one's constitutional rights.

Click here, here, here, here and here for previous installments of You Know Society Is Doomed. Hat tip to Obscure Store for many of the links.