Because Stupid Men Will Buy Anything

I have a beard because I hate to shave. I hate to shave because I grew up at a time with the Gillette Safety Razor ruled the world and thewould cut the bejeebus out of my face.

Even though my oft-used styptic pencil hit the trash when Gillette marketed the first surgically precise disposable razor in the early 1970s, I kept my beard. Same thing when Gillette rolled out the Mach 3 with the replaceable three-blade heads, or the Mach 3 Turbo, which added an aloe strip. Or that symbol of consumerism run amok, P&G's five-blade Fusion, which retails for an outrageous 25 dollars large for an eight pack.

I still hate to shave, and no number of blades are gonna change that fact no matter what these clowns do or say.

So there!